Toilet Learning - Tips for Parents and Caregivers

Each child is different, don't expect too much too soon.

Start when your child:

  • Shows signs of readiness - most children between the ages of two and three years old are ready.
  • Stays dry for two hours or more and/or wakes up dry in the morning or after naps.
  • Is interested in the toilet and shows a willingness to learn.
  • Can communicate through words, facial expression or body language that he/she needs to have a bowel movement or pass urine.
  • Knows he/she is "going to the bathroom" or needs "to go". Encourage him/her to tell you.
  • Can manage his/her own clothing and potty.
  • Shows a preference for clean, dry clothing.
  • Asks to use the potty or toilet.
  • Seems eager to please and likes to imitate parents.

Getting Started

  • Show your child the potty and what it is used for.
  • Take him/her to the potty immediately when he/she asks. Don't delay. Stay with him/her.
  • Don't force your child to stay on the potty until something is done. Tell him/her it's OK and he/she can try again later.
  • Do an activity, such as reading a story on Toilet learning.
  • Allow child to see others using the toilet.

Things to Avoid

  • Toilet learning when major changes are occurring in your child's life, such as a new home, new baby, new caregiver or illness in the family.
  • Attempting toilet learning when your child is in the "no" stage, is upset or is having tantrums.
  • Becoming involved in power struggles.
  • Allowing your child to see your frustration.

Things to Remember

  • Be positive and casual in your approach.
  • Never punish or make a child feel anxious.
  • Accidents may happen up to five years of age.
  • Bowel control usually happens before bladder control.
  • Nighttime bladder control can take longer.
  • If you start before your child is ready, the process can take longer and cause your child to feel disappointment, frustration and shame.
  • If toilet learning is not going well, take a break and try again in a few weeks.

Toilet learning, or control of bowel and bladder function, is a major developmental step for a young child and requires much patience from parents.

For more information call Ottawa Public Health Information 613-580-6744 or Toll free: 1-866-426-8885.

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